The Avoidance of Pain

If you are like me, as you journey through your life, you seek to avoid pain. This is true about the great and the least, and if you don't believe me check out this quote from Thomas Jefferson, “The art of life is the art of avoiding pain; and he is the best pilot, who steers clearest of the rocks and shoals with which it is beset.”

With all due respect to the genius of one of our founding fathers, he is wrong.

Jesus makes it clear that if we are to follow Him, we will encounter pain. This world is broken and we are linked to this destruction with an unbreakable bond. But He also makes it clear that pain and suffering are a gift, a pathway to connecting with others that would be impossible without that experience. “It is good for me that I was afflicted, that I might learn your statues” - Psalm 119:71.

Hang on, we're just getting started . . . 

Starting Over . . .

It was not my intent, but I do find it interesting that my last post (last summer) was titled, "Why Don't We Get The Story We Want?"

You see, my belief in that statement is even stronger now, than when I wrote those words almost seven months ago. 

It is not an understatement to write that my world, my life, looks radically different than it did then. And in this crazy, fallen world, I don't think I'm alone in my circumstances. 

You see, seven months ago, I was married. I owned a house. But I also lacked peace. And joy. And worst of all, I had long ago jettisoned my dependence upon God.

Let me be clear, my lack of peace and joy were my choices. And I was very much aware that I was helpless to navigate the challenges that were before me. I was calling upon Jesus on a regular basis to deliver me from the numerous challenges that I was facing. And I very much believed that the Bible taught that even in the middle of challenging circumstances, God will always provide a path that leads to peace and joy. However, when in the throes of chaos, I still sought my way before seeking Him.

And my way will never lead to true peace and joy.

Lead Me To The Rock (Psalm 61)

 

Hear my cry, O God,

 listen to my prayer;

from the end of the earth I call to you

when my heart is faint.

Lead me to the rock

that is higher than I,

for you have been my refuge,

a strong tower against the enemy.

Let me dwell in your tent forever!

Let me take refuge under the shelter of your wings! Selah

For you, O God, have heard my vows;

you have given me the heritage of those who fear your name.

(Palm 61:1-5)

Divorce

During the months leading up to my divorce, I questioned everything about myself, so whenever friends or family questioned the reasons for our divorce, I was sometimes at a loss to explain. Yes, I was the one who started the divorce proceedings, after years of my spouse hinting, and then proclaiming that it was her desire to see us divorced. (Not that she was alone in this desire, but even this revelation is difficult to place on the timeline of our relationship) To make matters even more complicated, I was working on staff at a church. The prospective loss of my job and worse, my church fellowship was heavy on my heart when I started these proceedings.  NOTE: I'm writing this within days of my divorce becoming official. So even though this finality of court proceedings is a recent event at the time of this writing, I have mourned the loss of my marriage many years ago. 

The article below has been a great help in my search for healing . . . 

"I wasn’t blameless in my marriage. Far from it. I often acted self-righteously, believing I was never wrong. I said unkind things with a condescending tone. I lost my temper more times than I care to recall. There were moments when I struggled to remember joy and peace was a distant memory that seemed to belong to someone else's life. And that’s just for starters.